Everybody's Changing

There's this song that's been stuck in my head by Keane called Everybody's Changing. I'll link it here so you can have it stuck in yours as well.

I wasn't sure what to call this post because my mind is kind of messy today. It's been a while since I've posted anything; I realized having a public diary is sometimes messy. It makes me (and anyone else who keeps on as well) face head-on what we feel. It's a good thing because there's always others who go through the same or similar situations, but it's hard nonetheless.


Lately, I've been all over the place with my moods. I want to tell my close friends what's going on, but I feel like I'm whining. I feel like I have no right to complain because I have a house, food, water, a bed, and overall good health. Unfortunately, that doesn't help the bad feelings go away. It becomes hard to focus on tasks, hard to focus in class and hard to follow the witty conversations between friends. When I find something worth focusing on, it doesn't seem as important to others.

All of that has contributed to me keeping to myself, for the most part. It's not a great feeling, but I've been learning to manage it. What's the right balance between sharing and dealing with it internally? I'm not sure. Some people believe it's better to be an open book, and talking about problems helps. Others think it's better to not worry others and deal with it alone. I'm not sure where I fall on that spectrum. For the most part, I think it's good to share but when I have my dark days, I want to be left alone.

For some reason, my good days are starting to blend into the bad ones and now there's no good or bad day. There's always a little bit of both. I'm never quite sure of how I feel, but I've learned that if I feel good or bad, I should just ride the wave and try not to dwell too much. Hopefully I get to leave this funky state soon.

Lots of good vibes to you all.